Canvas...

Well... God answered me regarding my concerns about the Canvas community in class yesterday:

"What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is preached; and in this I rejoice, yes, and will rejoice." Philippians 1:18

I feel so convicted, but in a good way, I mean, I'm glad God is teaching me, even if it means some (or a lot of) love motivated spankings along the way.

Taking a break from Canvas

So I am involved in this online community that designs Christian shirts and votes on them for a company called C2:8... it is by far my favorite store, and for Christmas, my wonderful Mother-in-law sent me three hoodies and a shirt from that store that I wear every day. In fact, in my most recent care package, Travis and I got shirts we had ordered for each other for Christmas presents (we each picked out one)... mine is drying, and I can't wait to wear it.

The only problem is... the community is half crazy. There are some awesome brothers and sisters that I am getting to know, that I really love, but then there are other people that are really hating on people. That's not an eloquent way to say it, but a lot of the people on the site are in their teens or twenties... and being on the later end of the twenties (as in, over 25) and being married with two kids, I don't really have a need for extra drama in my life, such as the lashing out and all that. So I'm taking a break. Here is my most recent design...

http://www.canvasthreads.com/DesignDetails.aspx?id=5415

People misquote verses and no one cares, they change what the Bible says, there a ton of designs with images of Jesus, which we don't wear because we feel like we don't want to make an idol out of the image of Jesus (having lived in very idol-prone cultures). Not that I want to be legalistic, I don't, but I am very sensitive about misrepresenting the word of God. I don't feel comfortable doing that, and I wouldn't feel comfortable wearing clothes that did that.

I'm just bummed. I thought this would be a cool outlet for the creativity I feel God has given me, and now it's just a source of grief. I'm praying about it though. I know God will give me the peace that surpasses all understanding.

THC W5: Ask!

THC W5: Ask!

22 February 2010 – 27 February 2010

"So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.”

Luke 11:9-10

This week I want to talk about prayer. I know there are so many times when I will say to someone, “I will pray for you.” But in the last year or so, I really started to make an effort to actually sit down and pray for those people, and honestly, I have to make myself a note or I forget! Prayer is the most effective spiritual tool that we have, and we just don’t use it enough. Today I want to talk about something that keeps us from praying, even when we are praying, a hindrance to prayer.

“If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened”

Psalm 66:18

“One who turns away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer is an abomination.”

Proverbs 28:9

This is where the concept of holiness comes in. If you are living in unrepentant sin, your prayers are an abomination to the Lord. That is serious stuff. Just think about how many times you pray for someone and then go take part in something you know is a sin, something you ought to repent and turn from doing. I used to do that all the time when I was younger and rebelling against my Father in Heaven. I remember even one time praying that I would not get pregnant when I was involved with fornication as a teenager!  God never heard those prayers, not because He didn’t want to hear me, but because I was causing myself to be out of communication with Him by living in sin.

“Behold, the LORD's hand is not shortened, That it cannot save; Nor His ear heavy, That it cannot hear. But your iniquities have separated you from your God; And your sins have hidden His face from you, So that He will not hear.”

Isaiah 59:1-2

Your iniquities have separated you from God! Take another step toward holiness this week involving your prayer life. Turn from habitual sin in your life, repent to the Lord, and make yourself able to be heard by Him so that when you pray for others (and for yourself) that He will be able to hear and answer your prayers! Pray for someone different every day, and remember to be specific about their needs. 

Remember, that answers are not always yes, but also no, and sometimes silence. They are all still answers (and that is another blog entirely)

Dear Lord,

Thank You that You are so merciful to forgive us when we repent and ask and for Your mercy and grace. Please forgive us Father, help us to turn from our sin and to keep our hearts, minds, eyes, and mouths glorifying Your holy name! Make us effective prayer warriors for Your kingdom. Amen.

THC W4 Results

Imagine that you go into the bank to take out money, but first you ask the teller if he can print out your balance for you, so you do not overdraft. When he hands you the balance, you look down in horror to see that your account is in the negative. In fact, it is not only a little negative, it is minus in the millions. That is how we are with sin, all along, we are depositing our works, but our account is still in the negative because no matter how many good things we do, we are sinners, and our number of sins will always outnumber the good things we do. “Well, I don’t sin that much, in fact, I think my account would be in the positive.” If you think of all the bad things you have actually carried out, such as murder, bearing false witness, or adultery, it might not be that large of a number. But the way Jesus defines sin is not always carrying out something like murder. Sin is counted against you when you even think something in your heart.

In Matthew 5:22 Jesus said, “But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. And whoever says to his brother, ‘Raca!’ (Brain-less) shall be in danger of the council. But whoever says, ‘You fool!’ shall be in danger of hell fire.” I cannot count how many times driving on the highway in California that I was yelling, “Raca!” at my fellow drivers, and you always hear that example, because it’s true! My sins are in the millions! I have been sinning since I came out of my mother’s womb, that is my nature as a human in a sinful world, and a whole lifetime of trying to do nice things for other people can never make up for that.

Imagine you are still in the bank, holding your balance print out, and you hand the teller a card. The teller takes your card, and out of your negative account gives you $2,500. The amount you need to pay your bills and buy groceries. It doesn’t make sense. You don’t have any money in your account, in fact you owe the bank money, but he’s giving you money anyway. The teller hands the card back to you and you look down and notice on it are the words, “Grace through faith.” That is what grace is! We don’t deserve anything. In fact, we are in an enormous amount of debt because of our sins. But God sent His Son, Jesus Christ, so that we could believe on Him, and be saved through faith, having been given grace. We didn’t deserve for Jesus to die on the cross to save our sins, but He did it anyway, because of His love for us!! Not only did God supply the payment for our sins, He wants to give us more than that, and bless us, simply because He loves us!

“And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the LORD your God…”
-Deuteronomy 28:2

I pray that God revealed illustrations of His grace to you as well, and that as you meditate on all that He has done for us, that you will give Him thanks everlasting!

THC W4: An Illustration of Grace

Hey everyone! Sorry that this is a day late (well for you in the States, not really). Homework has been coming non stop and Travis was on weekend team this weekend doing lots of dishes, so things have been a bit crazy. Please pray for Travis, he is still feeling nauseated all the time and is still occasionally throwing up his pills (which is not good since they keep his flare ups in check). So yeah, please pray for him.

THC W4: An Illustration of Grace

15 February 2010 - 21 February 2010

This week's challenge is to create your own illustration of grace. Below I have posted an example that Chuck Smith uses in his book, "Why Grace Changes Everything." I will post my own example on here as the result at the end of the week. Be blessed!

When Jesus was praying in the garden, He said, "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done" (Luke 22:42). He was saying, "If it is possible that men can be saved by any other means than My death - if they can be saved by being religious, by somehow gaining their own righteousness - then I do not want to go to the cross. Please don't put Me through this horrible ordeal." But it was not possible, and so He went to the cross, died, was buried, and rose again. His death made it possible for God to extend His grace to you and me.

Perhaps an illustration will help to make this clear. Imagine that you were charged with a crime. You are accused of trespassing on a neighbor's property. As any defense attorney knows, there are two possible ways for you to be cleared of the charge. You may seek to prove that you didn't trespass on his property, or you may seek to prove that you had every right to be there.

Now apply this logic to our spiritual situation. God has charged us with being sinners - for rebelling against His law and His will. He has charged us with unrighteousness.

How can we be justified from those charges? We can't say that we are innocent, for we are guilty. All of us have sinned. Nor can we say that we had a right to do what we did because we had no such right. Our actions were clearly wrong. How, then, can the law be of value to us in our desire to be forgiven? The answer is, it can't. The case is open and shut. We didn't have a right to do it, we did it anyway, and thus we stand guilty.

The Great Bank Robbery

Let's change the illustration. Suppose that I robbed a bank willfully and deliberately. The law condemns me because I can't say I didn't do it or prove that I didn't do it. The video camera caught me. I can't say I had a right to do it because robbery is not included in the First Amendment. Therefore, there is no way I can be forgiven within the law.

During the trial, I might try to say, "I promise I won't rob any more banks as long as I live. I will live a good, clean life from now on. I will never take anything from anybody wrongfully again." That still doesn't justify me from what I have already done. I might try to say that I should be forgiven because I did so much good with the money. I gave some to the church and I fed my family. But my "righteous" deeds cannot counterbalance or absolve my guilt.

The judge may order that I pay back to the bank all the money that I took. As part of my sentence, he may order me to pick up tin cans along the freeway to help keep America beautiful. I may spend the rest of my life doing good things, but still I will not be absolved of what I have done. All the works of the law cannot erase my guilt. My past wrongdoings still exist. I am a robber and the verdict is clear.

Why is it, then, that in spiritual matters so many people seek to plead innocent before God by virtue of all their good works?

There are many of us who respond to our sin, guilt, and unrighteousness with regret and new resolutions. We want to make amends and turn over a new leaf. But those efforts can't win our forgiveness. Even our best efforts cannot take away the guilt of what we have already done. We can never be justified by good works. Even a whole life of good works cannot atone for a single sin.

God's basis of forgiveness is the sacrifice of His only begotten Son. All of our guilt - all of our past and future wrongdoings - have been laid to the charge of Jesus Christ, the innocent Lamb, the perfect one who knew no sin. He died for us. He bore our guilt; He suffered and died for our sins. Paul wrote, "For He hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him" (2 Corinthians 5:21). Jesus became sin for us that we might be pardoned through Him. In other words, He switched places with us. "Though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, that ye through his poverty might be rich" (2 Corinthians 8:9). He has taken our sin and forgiven us through our simple faith and trust in Him.

I'm missing it...

"I am filled with comfort, I am exceeding joyful in all our tribulation."

2 Corinthians 7:4

When I read this verse, I feel so convicted. I have been struggling against a certian trial all week and finally came to the point where I asked God to show me, because I felt like I couldn't take another step towards His promise to Travis and I unless I heard from Him regarding something, and He was faithful, He met me in that place and gave me great reassurance, but I wish I would have been able to find joy in this tribulation!! How much better that would have been. Thank the Lord He is still working in me and refining me, proving me under the holy light of Jesus Christ.

THC W3: Grace vs. Legalism

Week 3: Grace vs. Legalism

8 February 2010 through 14 February 2010

"There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness." Proverbs 30:12

Each semester the students on campus have to do two book reports, and even though I don’t get credit for it, I am trying to do the same requirements because I feel like I will learn a lot from doing them. The first book I read is called, “Why Grace Changes Everything” by Chuck Smith.

For the next couple of weeks I think we should spend some time examining grace, so I am going to periodically post chunks of the book on here for you to read and meditate on. This week the quotations and scripture will be based upon the theme Grace vs. Legalism. Look up the scriptures listed, and examine them for yourself in context. This book is the best explanation of grace I have ever read, and presents the gospel regarding grace in such a practical way. I hope you will be blessed, as I have continued to be, by this book, by Pastor Chuck, and mostly by the Lord.

Here we go:

"A Dead-End Righteousness

One very common way of trying to become righteous is to define what righteousness is and isn't, to set up a code, and then live according to this code. There's only one problem: No one ever lives up to their own code, so we conjure up a great number of excuses to explain why we fail. The most common is that our failure isn't really our fault.

If I drop a glass and break it, it isn't that I am uncoordinated; it's because someone called me when he shouldn't have. Others were making too much noise in the other room, so my mistake is really their fault. "Look what you caused me to do!" I say. "You made me do it, so it isn't my fault." None of us like to accept blame.

This attitude goes all the way back to Adam. He blamed his failure on Eve. "The woman that you gave to be my wife," he told God, "it's her fault that I am the way I am" (see Genesis 3:12). Proverbs declares, 

"There is a generation that are pure in their own eyes, and yet is not washed from their filthiness" (Proverbs 30:12).

If you think you are a very pure person and yet are not washed from your filthiness, righteousness has evaded you. The Bible says, "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.... If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us" (1 John 1:8,10). Scripture states our problem clearly: 

"All the world [stands] guilty before God... all have sinned and come short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:19,23).

Whenever we try to establish our righteousness by keeping rules, eventually we are forced to admit we operate on a sliding scale. I will always look morally better to myself than I do to you, and you will always look morally worse to me than you do to yourself. I can look at your life and see all kinds of flaws; but when I look at myself, the few flaws I notice don't seem so bad.

Even the righteousness I can achieve by what I do is only a sham righteousness. The Bible declares, 

"We are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags" (Isaiah 64:6).

If our relationship with God depended upon being righteous and good, we would never make it.

It's almost comical to see some people parade around in their rags. They saunter around with their "holier than thou," gaudy kind of religiosity, with a hyperspiritual air about them. They talk in whispered tones because they think it sounds holy and righteous. They use King James English because, as we all know, "Thees" and "Thous" are far more righteous than "yous" and "yours." We see them puffed out in their righteousness, strutting around, showing off ... and God shakes His head and says, "Filthy rags."

If my relationship with God depended upon my being righteous and good, I would never make it. I have failed. I have come short of the glory of God. The best that I can manage is when I am having a good day, my biorhythms are right, and everything is going well - really flowing. I'm cool. Man, I am really something. But even on my best days God looks down and says, "Filthy rags." My best efforts simply aren't enough.

Trying to keep the law condemns me, for the true law deals with inward attitudes. Back when I labored under this standard of self-righteousness, I found I resented certain things other people were doing. I became bitter. I realized that I hated certain people and that I was jealous and covetous of the things they owned. I noticed I had violated my own code and had wiped out my relationship with God. Nothing was left to do but to start all over again.

Unfortunately, just about the time I would feel as though I were restoring a right relationship with God, something happened. I blew up and down I went again. I would be forced to start climbing the ladder of good works once more until I got to the rung where I finally felt I could relate to God. No sooner would I reach that rung, however, than somebody would pull a stupid move on the freeway and I would yell, "Where did you get your driver's license, you idiot?" And the whole process would start all over again.

What's the Standard?

Those who believe that they can be made acceptable to God without Jesus need to deal with some crucial questions. If they believe they can make it to heaven by achieving a certain level of goodness, what standard do they have to live up to? What will God require of them? So many say, "I feel that I am basically a kind and good person and am willing to stand before God on my own merit."

But these people fail to take into account that God's standards are different than ours. Jesus showed us God's requirement for those who would strive for heaven on their own power when He said, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect" (Matthew 5:48). The standard for the person who wants to be right with God is nothing short of absolute perfection - not just trying hard, or being sincere, but a flawless keeping of all God ever intended for man. Clearly, those who believe they can earn eternal life by their good works have a distorted understanding of the holiness of God and what it means to be right with God.

If we are going to set up a standard of righteous conduct, we need to use the one established by Jesus Christ. Jesus is the only person whose life prompted God to say, "This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased" (Matthew 3:17). To enjoy fellowship with God, we must be as righteous as Jesus. In John 16:8,10 Jesus said, 

'And when he [that is, the Holy Spirit] is come, he will reprove the world of... righteousness, because I go to my Father, and ye see me no more." 

Jesus' ascension into heaven was God's witness to the world about His Son. It is as if He were saying, "This is the righteousness that I will accept in heaven." Jesus' life is the only standard of righteousness. If I want to be accepted by God, I must be as righteous as Jesus Christ. The Scriptures show that there is only one kind of righteousness that God will accept: the very righteousness of Christ Himself. So, if we want to stand before God on the basis of our own good works, we must live a life that measures up to the goodness we see in Jesus.

But I realize that is impossible. I can't achieve that kind of righteousness. Jesus Himself said, "I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart" (Matthew 5:28). He said, "I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment" (Matthew 5:22). He further said, "Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you. Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloak forbid not to take thy coat also. Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again" (Luke 6:27-30). And He commanded us to "love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again!' (Luke 6:35).

How can anybody be that righteous? I know I can't. I've failed miserably. Does that mean, then, that I must forever be alienated from God? Is there no way I can ever enjoy fellowship with God? Do I have to go on in this emptiness, in this frustration, seeking after and reaching out for something I can never obtain?

If there is any hope for us to be forgiven by God, there must be another basis for it other than our works. As Paul declares, "By the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight" (Romans 3:20).

If we are ever to enjoy fellowship with God, it will have to be on some basis other than our own righteousness. The rules that God has established for righteousness are far too stringent for us to abide by. We can't do it. Our only hope is that another form of righteousness has been provided for us, a righteousness based on a totally different principle than our own works.

Thank God, there is such a principle! It's called grace."

Chuck Smith, "Why Grace Changes Everything" pages 17-22

THC W2 Results

After much prayer and seeking, and somewhat discontent attitude floating around me all week, on Thursday night God revealed to me during worship that the thing that I need to give up is pride. I know, everyone struggles with pride because it’s engrained in us, but it is a more specific sort of pride. Sometimes I have a hard time with the fact that I don’t have a career, and I find things to do in order to keep myself busy, but also with some kind of outcome I have in mind. For a while it has been graphic art, and the things I was creating just weren’t working out the way that I had planned. I often feel like God has partially gifted me in so many areas, but not fully in any one area. I can write songs and play the guitar, but my singing leaves much to be desired. I can teach, but my knowledge of the scriptures isn’t as developed as it ought to be. But Travis reminded me that God has already equipped me for the works He has for me. I was trying to figure out the source of my discontentment and I finally figured it out on Thursday. Thursday during lunch someone came to me and told me that my class had been canceled because my teacher was in the hospital (he has been in and out of the hospital for the last week and a half) and that I was to listen to an mp3 instead. Well, I asked a few more people who seemed to corroborate this story, and went home instead of going to class. Well, it was misinformation, and the announcement that had been made was only for people who were going into Szekes to get their visas that day. So I walk into dinner and one of the pastors looks at me and says, “Someone was absent in class today.” I wanted to die, I was so upset I was crying over my noodles and beef at dinner. I knew I could listen to it on the computer later and still grasp the same spiritual truths but I was so upset because I knew that an unexcused absence means it will be impossible for me to get an A in that class, the only class I am taking. If you know me, you know, I like to get As. I take being a student very seriously. But God reminded me, He doesn’t care about what grade I get, I’m not here to get good grades. I’m not saying I shouldn’t do my best, of course I should, but the end goal is not a good grade, it is to be more prepared to enter into the ministry of being a full time missionary abroad with my family. My pride was the problem, I wanted to be able to say that I got all As while at bible college. I realized that my pride has been prompting a lot of my discouragements lately. The reason being I have been trying to do everything in my own strength instead of depending on the Lord to lead me and then equip me with the things I need in order to fulfill those leadings.

“The pride of your heart has deceived you, you who dwell in the clefts of the rock, whose habitation is high; You who say in your heart, ‘Who will bring me down to the ground?’ Though you ascend as high as the eagle, and though you set your nest among the starts, from there I will bring you down,’ says the Lord.” Obadiah 3-4

The pride of my heart was deceiving me into thinking that God was not supplying for my needs, but that was because I had needs for things He never called me to do. Pride is so dangerous! In fact, it was my pride that made me think pride would not creep into my heart. I would have never guessed that pride would be what God was calling me to give up because in my pride, I didn’t think I was prideful!

Dear Lord, thank You that You have shown us something about ourselves that we didn’t see. Please continue to refine us by Your fire and make us into the creations we need to be in order to do the work for Your kingdom that You have called us to. We love You so much! Amen

Still Quarantined

Well, now that Ksena is finally starting to get over the flu, of course Kati has it. She is doing a bit better today, but I cannot recall a time in my life when I have been thrown up and pooped on more...

I hate being stuck in the house this much. Maybe I'll ask Travis if I can make the trek up to the castle tomorrow for some meals just to get out. It's snowing like CRAZY!

I'll post the result for THC this week tomorrow... I bet you will never guess what the Lord revealed to me that I need to get rid of! I hope He spoke to each of you through this as He has to me :)

Sidenote: I really like the new genius thing on iTunes that takes a song and makes a playlist out of it. I'm currently listening to a play list based on my new favorite song "Real to Reel" by Above The Golden State

Updates on the babes

Here is an update from Sharon Markey about Judah Billings:
Judah has been diagnosed with a ventricular septal defect, also known as a hole in the heart. He also has other heart defects as a result of this one. The doctors have told Paul and Melanie that he will need surgery to repair his heart, but the timing is uncertain, since it is not clear exactly how serious his heart defects are. Paul and Melanie plan to take Judah to the States for the surgery, and they are trying to find out how soon he could get an appointment with a specialist there. They ask you to pray for supernatural healing for Judah. Please also pray for the peace that passes understanding to guard their hearts and minds.

Grace is doing much better, thank you for your prayers for this family!

And here is an update from Nick Cady on Felicia:
Felicia had her MRI yesterday, but it will take one week for them to get the results.

Because Felicia got moved out of ICU on Saturday, her new doctor doesn't want to transfer her to the Eger hospital, but wants to continue treating her in Budapest. This was kind of a bummer, but we are able to stay in Budapest this week for three days and visit her.
Additionally, Felicia has been doing so well that the doctor said that if her pneumonia clears up in the next few days, she would even send Felicia home to us by the end of the week! That would be amazing; we would love to have her home!
Prayer requests:

• Felicia's total healing - for her brain, her pneumonia, and a kidney stone they found yesterday.
• For Nate, who is sick of traveling.
• For Rosemary's recovery